EARL GNASH, WTFG april fool Correspondent
>>>>> “shit,
It’s news to Me!...”
EARL
GNASH,
WTFG
april fool Correspondent
>>>>>
“shit, It’s news to Me!...”
The mysterious behavior of Barack Obama has been
resolved: he was kidnapped the day
before his inauguration by G. Gordon Liddy and delivered to Dick Cheney at his
"undisclosed location" in the mountains of southern
Pennsylvania.
A clone was created by
Halliburton and was switched into the White House; the clone is chipped and
follows orders from a wireless device; it was water-boarded and hypnotized at
the undisclosed location by
Karl Rove and a former CIA psy-ops psycho linguist.
A ham radio hobbyist in East Texas tweaked his
aerial and was suddenly able to pick up the wireless messages from Cheney to
the Obama clone. He sold the recordings
to the National Inquirer, which will publish them later today.
The recording show that the Obama clone was told, among
other things, to:
* continue
the Bush bailout program.
* continue
the war in Iraq, expand one in Afghanistan, prepare to bomb Iran.
* retain Tim
Geither.
* ignore a
single-payer option.
* open
coastlines for oil drilling.
The devious plan masterminded by former President
Dick Cheney had a final twist: the Obama
clone would not seek a second term, endorse Cheney-Bush in 2012 (Liz & Jeb)
and reveal he is not an American citizen, but actually, from the twin star
system of Sirius, Not Sirius.
